The Yharnam Diaries Extended – Prologue
It has been a year now. Exactly a year today. There is a full moon tonight. Just like back then. I do not think the odds of that are supposed to be very high.
Yharnam was a trial for me. The Hunt was long. I sometimes feel like not all of me made it out of there. Maybe a part of me still roams the place, lost and tormented. A horrible thought.
I have come a long way though. With Ellie’s help, and of course Mother’s, I believe I have made significant recovery. The dress, the axe, and the blunderbuss are locked away. I convinced them to let me place the crown on the mantelpiece. Sometimes I think that I should not have. Looking at it provides a mix of comfort and discomfort.
I have written before of how hard it was to give it up. To take off the crown. To remove the garb. To stop using the title. A part of me still believes it is mine by right.
On a more positive note, I feel like the last year has helped me understand Mother better. I always thought she was a bit strange. That she did not see the world the same way the rest of us did. I can empathise with that now.
I wonder if Ellie now has thoughts like that about me. She has not talked much about it, and I am afraid to ask for her thoughts. At least I have not felt that she looks at me any less kindly than she did before. I cannot express how much relief that grants me.
I do not expect to ever return to as I was. Our experiences shape who we are, and what I went through cannot be undone. But I do believe that I can figure out a way to live with who I am now, and move forward with my life.